Challenge 4: Cure Black and White Thinking
Hello my lovelies,
Today, for Challenge #4, I am going to teach you a little trick to stop our hormonal, crazy minds from burning out. (shoutout to Falin, from MCH 7D, who taught me this trick during my stay)
Human beings tend to overdramatize situations, especially when it comes to the future.
The snowball effect; one bad thing will curse the rest of our day, our week, our lives, etc.
We see life as black or white; if it's not perfect, if it's not the best, it is AUTOMATICALLY a failure.
Problem: life, 99.99999% of the time, is nor a super dark shade of black, nor a bright, angelic, perfect white.
It's a smushy gray shade.
Not accepting that life can't always be perfect leads to feeling disappointed and unaccomplished, because you simply CANNOT reach those super amazing, high, out-of-this-world goals all the time.
You haven't failed yourself, your expectations have.
How do we change that? We separate the black, the white and the most-likely-going-to-happen-because let's-face-it-thats-how-life-works sections in our minds.
I call it; the drama queen reality check:
Here's what you do: take a situation in your day to day life that stresses you (most of the time, it's because we overdramatize this situation that it becomes stressful).
I chose to take for this example; an exam.
Separate into 3 columns: the white, the black and the most likely.
In the first column (white) you write the best of the best thing that could happen, usually what we imagine and then don't necessarily achieve
Example: Score a 100% on this exam, get high praise from your teacher, get an award at the end of the year because you are so amazing,
In the 2nd (black), write the worst possible outcome of this situation.
Example: Fail miserably, fail that semester, fail entire school year, don't graduate high school, work at a miserable job for the rest of my life
And in the 3rd, and most important column, write what is going to most likely happen if you just try your best
Ex: If I study, I know I can pass.
Look at what you've written; you clearly won't die if you don't achieve those ridiculous first goals, and if you work hard you know for sure that complete failure in all aspects of your life is not necessary. Does the 3rd column look that scary to you?
Mhmm, didn't think so :)
So I challenge you to try and do this on a daily basis, just in your head. You can actually make yourself smile over the ridiculous things you imagine.
Oh! And I'm not telling you to settle for less; go after your dreams! Work hard!
But remember that you can't die of setbacks, you probably can die of a heart attack at age 16 from being a crazy ridiculous drama queen.
I would know, I am one :)
Stay strong and breathe,