Me and Acceptance and Possible Vulnerability

Hello my loves! 

Here is a creative writing entry by http://misanthropicdemoness.tumblr.com :)
enjoy <3

At the end of the day I am the only one who loves and accepts myself. I feel that people understand a part of me but not all of it. at the end of the day all this ‘love’ from others seems like one big scam to me. I am literally the only person I love in this world. This body that I am inhabiting is beautiful and real and wonderful and safe only to me. Everyone else seems so foreign and unforgiving to me, with their judgemental stares and how they criticize my body, my home with their hurtful scathing words and their cutting remarks. So that’s why I’m the only person that loves my body. I love every inch of it. Every stretch mark reminds me of the growth I went through and is a testament to the length of life many people cannot afford in this sad, putrid and rotting world. Every single hair on my legs and arms reminds me of a plain rich with trees. The dark circles under my eyes remind me of the nights I spent working for the things I want and are therefore an indication of my hardworking and meticulous spirit. The sweat that seeps from my skin is not disgusting. It is an indication of how absolutely alive I am from the inside and the outside. It is an indication of the outpouring of energy from metabolism. My heart is beating and there is blood coursing through my veins and arteries. It is an indication that I am a living being and there is a whole universe of energy inside me. It is an amazing thing.

I am the ruler of the grotesque domain I call my mind. I am in control of every word that I put on the paper. I am a spiritual being with feelings and emotions and ideas inside my brain. Every idea in my head stands at attention in rank and file, silently and patiently waiting to be used. They are as black as my soul and as red as the burns they cause. I feel like what I have to say is important. I don’t know if it’s selfish of me to think this way but I don’t really care now. Remember? I said that I am the only person that loves and accepts my self. So I don’t want to hate parts of me because there’s already so much hate and self hate in this world. It’s so tiring and depressing and frustrating seeing this collective low self esteem so I don’t want to add to this anymore.

My words are the clang of steel against steel in the dead of the night. They help liberate me. They empower me. They make me heard. My emotions are the power behind my alive and thriving soul and they help me deal with all the shit that the world throws at me. So I’m not a weak person that can’t take damage. I am the only person that comforts me. It’s my hand that wipes away my tears and it’s my body that helps me channel my negativity through physical activity, At the end of the day I am the only person that loves and accepts myself.

xoxo

Gabby