Collarbones: WTF

Good morning my beautiful fudgies:)

I should just stop going on Tumblr all together, shouldn't I?

Because it seems like every other week, I discover another unsettling body negative facet of this website that makes me want to throw a newborn out of a window, and every other week I write rant about it on the blog.

So I apologize in advance, but this is another fascinating edition of a recurring segment I'd like to call:
Tumblr: what. the. @#$%^& 
Apparently, the thigh gap has a hip, new cousin called the protruding collarbone. Yay!

Indeed, the new sign of ultimate beauty (or thinness, because really, isn't that the same thing?) is a defined clavicle. Its rise to fame is quite the typical Cinderella story: the clavicle used to be a body part no one paid attention to, until (most likely sometime during the 1990's heroin chic Kate Moss era) someone realized it was a classy way of ensuring that no matter what you are wearing, as long as your décolleté is exposed, everyone will know just how fabulously malnourished you look. It became the most prized possession in all of Hollywood, especially since the collarbone cannot (legally) be surgically enhanced. (the NY times explains all of its appeal here: http://www.nytimes.com/2007/05/10/fashion/10clavicle.html?_r=0.)

But in recent years, the razor sharp collarbone fad has grown exponentially, mostly amongst teenage girls. But why, you ask? Yeah, you probably guessed it.
Tumblr. 
Oh tumblr, with your pro-ana and thinspo blogs, altering the body image reality of millions, how I love and loathe you all at once.

Many of the reasons why I dislike this trend are the same as my hatred for the thigh gap, which you can read about here, but there is one other major reason I find this obsession ridiculous.

You can fake a protruding collarbone. 

Now I don't promote, agree with or condone the unhealthy fixation of any body part, but if for some odd reason you need to look like your clavicle could be used as a weapon, YOU DON'T NEED TO LOSE WEIGHT OR HARM YOURSELF IN ANY WAY.

The thing that makes the collarbone prominent is the shadows underneath and above the bone, making the hollows look deeper, and the light that reflects directly on the bone, making the bone appear raised.

Do you really think everyone you see in commercials, on the red carpet and on TV have these amazingly defined cheekbones, noses and clavicles? Think again.

You can do your own research on Youtube or other websites, but I hope this will pop in your head next time I tell you that the images you plaster on your walls or on your dashboard aren't always what they seem.




Have an amazing week, my lovelies.
xoxo

Gabby

How To: Body Positive Shopping

Hello my angels!

Men can say what they want, but shopping is a sport.
If not physical (walk for 4 hours in flats that were made to stop your feet's circulation, then you'll see), then surely emotional.

There are many ways to do the whole shopping experience wrong, to go in to just have fun and walk out with blisters on your feet and holes in your self-esteem.
Listen up, ladies and gents, this is how you shop body positively.

http://karinashappiness.tumblr.com/ inspired this post. go say hi:)

1. Do Not Go When You're Feeling Low
You wake up on a Saturday morning, and you're feeling kind of blah.
But hey, today's the day you planned on going shoe shopping!
You walk into a mall and you're bombarded by models and mirrors, a dangerous combination.
Your self-esteem shrinks, your wallet shrinks.
You walk out and lay down on the parking lot cement and die.

Okay, so that last part might be a tad exaggerated, but when you're feeling down on yourself, you are more likely to spend money on items you otherwise wouldn't to make yourself feel better, to compensate for your low self-esteem. Why do you think they put those pore-magnifying mirrors in Sephora?!
Your life sucks, you suck, the world sucks, but these shoes will make it all better, said Jimmy Satan Choo. 

Go when you're emotionally ready to be hit by a ton of size 0s. Otherwise, Netflix it is.

2. Buy Your Size
You walk into (enter favorite store) and try on some clothes.
Cool, you're a size 6!
Then you move on to the next store, and while trying on some other pieces,
NIGHTMARE! SIZE 6 IS TIGHT!
The dream hath crumbled, you're a hippo, it's over.

STOP, child.
There is a reason why one store fit and the other one didn't.
Sizes aren't universal, they are approximate.
Certain stores have admitted to shifting sizes up (a normal 4 is labeled a 6) to make women feel better and buy their clothes just for the size tag! Don't be a fool, wear the size for you.

Newsflash: no one will stop you in the street to check what size your shirt is in.
But if you buy the right size, and you look amazing and feel comfortable, someone might stop you in the street to ask where you got that fierce shirt.
Just saying, I'm basically making you famous.

3. Plan Ahead

You've been walking around for a while.
Your shoes are tight, and they are sucking the life out of you.
You just had Thai food, and you feel bloated and dehydrated.
You're starting to get cranky.
UGH this shirt is disgusting.
"I'm disgusting".
You call your mom crying from the changing room while the saleslady awkwardly pretends not to hear you (14 year old me, everyone).

To stay focused, happy and energized, hence to have a productive body positive shopping experience, you have to plan ahead.

Wear comfy shoes. Limping is not in this season, my loves.
Bring a water bottle. Staying hydrated will prevent migraines and nervous breakdowns. Science.
Eat light to avoid a cramp or a bloated "omg I look 9 months pregnant"stomach.
I promise you'll be feeling a lot less "disgusting".

------

That's all for me today loves
Stay strong <3
xoxo

Gabby

Things You Don't Know About Gabby

Hello my angels,

I'm sitting here during my lunch break at work, bored out of my mind.
Here are 12 things you (probably) did not know about me

1. Middle Name? Technically, in Quebec Catholic tradition, if you're a girl you take Marie + your godmother's name, so Marie Diane? I don't even know, ask my mother.


2. Future Children? If I have children, probably with Justin Timberlake or Benedict Cumberbatch let's be real, I want to give them "old people" names. Such as Ivan, or Gertrude. Why? I cannot tell you, I'm going to be an awesome mom.

3. My Prom? My prom was the bomb.com No lie, yours cannot even compare. My friends and I skipped the drunkfest after party that my classmates had organized and went Go-Karting instead. Jealous, yet?

4. Favorite Scent? Morning Dew. Calvin Klein, Britney Spears, whoever; make that a damn fragrance.

5. Favorite Sound? The sound my cartilage makes when I get a piercing. Love me some needles. I'm basically going to die a heroin addict if this needle obsession continues.

6. Current Song You're Listening To? Can You Feel My Heart by BMTH. When I do boring excel sheets at work, it makes me feel like a gang-affiliated rebel. Face tattoo and all.

"Excuses Don't Burn Calories"

Hello my sweets,

I saw a picture of this shirt today on Tumblr, and felt compelled to write a quick little post about
it, which will probably turn into a full-fledged body politics rant, you know me:)
This won't be well written, or well researched, it will just be hella important.

This shirt was found at a Target, in the workout section.
At first, it seems fair. Technically, excuses such as "I'm too tired" do not get you to the gym. Fine.
But what really ticks me off is the fact that the end goal of exercise and maintaining of good health, as the garment suggests, is solely based on calorie counting.

1. It has been proved time and time again that exercise is only 10% of the weight loss cake; the bigger piece consists of food consumption, or lack thereof. So technically speaking, excuses don't burn calories, but honey, "chin ups" don't do too much either.

2. I must have missed the gym rat memo this month that dictated that all human beings should exercise to lose weight. Here are 10 reasons, or "excuses", to work out that have nothing to do with being a size 0:

1. to train for a marathon
2. to develop strength
3. to heal an injury
4. to improve cardiovascular health
5. to manage stress
6. to achieve self-set goals
7. to increase flexibility
8. to manage anger
9. to keep up with kids/grandkids
10. to be HEALTHY 

3. Being healthy has nothing to do with calories, or size, or a dumb shirt at Target. 

Being healthy means being confident and happy, treating your body with care by feeding it good nutrients, but also spoiling its tastebuds once in a while. 

Being healthy means being able to enjoy life to its fullest, without anything holding you back.
Being healthy means, above all else, treating your mind and body healthily, whatever that means for you.

So if you see this shirt at your local Target, set it on fire. Or don't, I don't want my college applications to be labeled with a big fat red "Target terrorist" label. mmkay? ;)

xoxo

Gabby

Wanting To Get Better: Recovery

Hello my angel food cakes:)

I recently watched this supernaturally amazing video by my homegirl and idol Kati Morton.
First of all, if you aren't subscribed to her beautiful channel, I don't know what you are doing with your life.
Secondly, this video made me think about my journey, and about the recovery process.
Many people ask for help when they want to get better, or stay better.

But how do you want to get better? How do you want to stay healthy, stay safe, stay alive?
Kati gives this awesome trick which I will share with you today.
This is very personal but I feel that as a fudgie family, you are all capable of respect:)

Step 1: What are you looking forward to (this month, this year, this life)?

1. Getting my tattoo
2. Seeing my BFF Luana again
3. Going to the Queens of The Stone Age concert
4. Attending formal
5. Halloween!
6. Reading more books
7. Going to college
8. Having kids

Step 2: Can you do these things if you are laying in bed depressed, or chained to anxiety, or imprisoned by an eating disorder? Can you do these things and enjoy them? 

The answer is no.


Step 3: Keep working, keep self-loving, keep your strength. 

xoxo

Gabby

10 Reasons Why "FATshion" Matters

Hello my angels,

Here are my 10 reasons why Fat-Shion blogs, or plus size fashion, matters:

1. Because the meshing of the words fat and fashion symbolizes an intertwining. Fat and fashion are not separate, you can have both.

2. Because representation is important. When your eyes are only used to seeing a certain type of body, wearing a certain type of fashion, these images ink themselves into your skull. Fatshion is a way to undo that body negative bullshit.

3. Because most stores that are considered "hip" don't carry clothing for plus size girls.

4. Because if these stores do carry plus size clothing, items will be different, unflattering, or limited.

5. Because the average American woman is a size 12-14. So the average American woman isn't allowed to look cute, retail companies?

6. Because there is an overwhelming number of people who still believe "fat" people should conceal their bodies, wear loose fitting clothing, and be ashamed. Fatshion raises a big middle finger to that mentality.

7. Because the expression "the camera puts on ten pounds" frightens big girls away from the spotlight, when they should be expressing their sense of self as much as the next girl.

8. Because television and movies portray plus size women as dumb or loud or obnoxious. Every woman has a different personality, and fatshion blogs help plus size girls express themselves as individuals, not just a cartoon character.

9. Because the terms "chubby chaser" and "fat fetish" are a way to describe men who are attracted to women of a bigger size, as though it is bizarre for a man or anyone to find curves desirable and beautiful.

10. Because it shouldn't even be considered a separate type of blog in the first place.

Skinny Wrists, Skinny Hips: WTF

My beautiful fudgies,

Can I just ask the gods of thinspo where they come up with these ridiculous ideas?
Because it seems as though their nutrient-deprived following churns out these abhorrent goals every other day.

Today's pick? The motto "Skinny Wrists, Skinny Hips".
I'm 1000% serious, go on Tumblr and find it.
You know what, please don't. You might get sucked into the blackhole that is the thinspiration tag, and I would never forgive myself.

The meaning: If your hand can hold your opposite arm's wrists, and your fingers touch, wrapping themselves completely around your wrists, then you are adequately thin, hence the "skinny hips" add-on.

The logic: That's funny. There is none.

The ILLOGIC: 

1. Firstly, this mentality doesn't take into consideration the size of one's hands. I have dumpy, 3rd grader-sized fingers, so I can assure you, even if I lost 189 pounds, my hand could not wrap around my wrist.

2. Secondly, here is some basic human anatomy. Wrists? Bones. Hips? Bones. Booooooooooones. It's very simple: no matter how much weight you lose, your wrists and hips will not shrink. If you have unusually large wrists, the only way you can shave off some inches is to literally shave them off with a saw.
And I'd also like to ask in what scientific journal these young girls found the correlation between wrist and hip size, because as far as I'm concerned, skinny wrists equals genetics. Period.

3. Finally, but most importantly, this has nothing to do with wrists or hips. Girls and boys who suffer from extreme self-esteem problems will find flaws within themselves that don't exist, such as "fat wrists". Sure, I can come on here and rant about these weird obsessions, but that won't fix the problem.
There is no such thing as "skinny enough" for these sufferers, no matter how many times you tell them their hips are perfectly skinny enough.

All you can do is be there. Let them know, in person or even on their Tumblr ask, that you are there to listen. When they find the strength to admit their problem, then you can be of help. Because often times, these girls in their skinny wrists worlds suffer in skinny lips silence. Send them love, pray, and go on with your bad self:)

xoxo

Gabby