Handling Stress and Anxiety!

How is Wednesday treating you? 

This post is dedicated to my petit écureuil anxieux. <3 

Hello my beautiful fudgies!


I wanted to talk about stress today, because not only does it affect 'most everybody I know, but it can also trigger some serious self-esteem problems.
WHICH IS NOT SOMETHING WE ARE FANS OF IN THE FPP FAMILY, as you probably know by now <3

There are several levels, diagnostics, and consequences to anxiety, but in my book I can think of 2 perfect little words to describe the main cause of this unapologetic feeling:
over.worrying.

That's right, over thinking things that should always be looked from afar with perspective.

First of all,  IF ANYBODY GETS STRESSED BECAUSE THEY OVER-DRAMATIZE SITUATIONS, (pente fatale style) I HIGHLY RECOMMEND YOU CHECKING OUT THIS TRICK A PSYCHOLOGIST GAVE ME (IT WORKS SOOOOO SUPER WELL: http://fudgeperfection.blogspot.ca/2012/02/challenge-4-2012-bucket-list.html


Secondly, have you noticed that when you stare at your reflection in a mirror too long, it can get distorted and suddenly every flaw that could ever be imagined magically appears on your face?
(RAISES HAND ENTHUSIASTICALLY) OMG OMG I HAVE I HAVE!!!!

People of Fudge Perfection land; you are all incredibly intelligent but also hell-a creative people.
If your eyes go looking for flaws, oh trust me. THEY WILL FIND THEM, whether they are actually there or not.

So here are some of my tips (besides reading the post I mentioned up there) for handling anxiety
1. Breath in through the nose and let out all the bad anxiety (or air, whatever you wanna call it) through the mouth.

2. Get enough sleep. Yes, I know that it's not that easy, and I'm also incredibly hypocritical, because I don't sleep much at all, BUT IT IS PROVEN THAT TEENS WHO GET 7 OR MORE HOURS OF SLEEP CAN SEE THEIR ANXIETY LEVELS GO DOWN AND BONUS: SEE THEIR GRADES GET HIGHER, UP TO 10% MORE!
So go. to. bed.

3. Find time to be silly. I sing and dance all the time, and, especially when it comes to the former, I'm hilariously awful. But Gabby don't care. 
Laugh with your friends, take time to listen to christmas music (alex...), just make sure you live a life that isn't controlled by the things that make you nervous.

4. And finally, for those creatures we see in the mirror, I have 2 full posts about loving your reflection.
How could this still be a PROBLEM??? :P
hahaha jk, but they are here if you need a little reminder
1. post 1
2. post 2

Okay,
Stay Calm and Fudge Perfection `<3
Gabby

Wake Up Feeling Good

Second post in a row say what???!
:)

My lovely fudgies,

I don't know all of you.
Don't know your vices, your weaknesses, your stories.

But hopefully I can know that from now on, every morning, you will wake up feeling light, feeling free, feeling good.

And hoooooow, you ask, can you do that, oh wise one? :P

Here is a little trick that I adhere too religiously, and hopefully it can help you too <3

One of my biggest triggers is waking up feeling bloated, or fat, or just heavy.
Cuz you KNOW that if you wake up on the wrong side of the bed, citizens of the world better run and hide because it is NOT a good day.

And worst of all, YOU feel awful, and YOU want to run and hide from every living creature.

So what I do is make sure that I don't eat or drink anything 2 whole hours before I go to bed (water excluded of course, flavored water is like crack to me).

The next morning, I don't feel pregnant, so humans of this earth are safe yet another day and I feel like I can face almost anything!

Yayyyyyyy!!! Haha if you are alarmed by my cheesiness, you MUST be new.
Hi, I'm gabby :)

Xoxoxoxoxo
Gabby

What Doesn't Kill You

You've all heard it before:
From fortune cookies
To "deep" (please use the quotes to note my mockery) Facebook statutes
Even Kelly Clarkson (love the song btw, no criticism towards the artist herself)

"What doesn't kill makes you stronger!"

So lovely to hear.
So easy to believe.
Yet so incredibly, demoralizingly inaccurate.

Unleash the wrath of the non-believers (or rather the believers in this fairy tale approach to hardship) upon me.
I can take it, my loves.

As someone who has gone down the rabbit hole and almost died crashed into its pits;
As a friend of so many who have skimmed the surface or completely broken out of their capable limits;
I can honestly say I hate that saying.

It makes me feel, of all ironic things to feel, weak.
Because we are somehow exempt from all bad days, or poor choices, with this "new found strength" that so many impose upon us.
And if we ever show a sign of human weakness, it isn't perceived as a bad day.
Oh. No.
It's called a relapse.

And let me tell you something, my dear fudgies, you do not owe anyone the strength expected from you.

You have witnessed your fall, inch by inch, and you are recovering, by taking back every single one of those inches.

You may crawl out of this hole a little bit weaker than Mr sunshine next door.

You may climb out of the darkness a little more fragile than Rose Colored Sunglasses McGee over there.

But as you move on and face the hardship of life, you sure as fudge are a heck of a lot wiser than anyone who ever expected the incredible Hulk out of your morale.

No one knows where you have been.
So don't let them choose where you're going.
Be the strength you need to keep getting a little healthier, a little happier, and just keep fudging perfection.
You know you want to...;) <3 data-blogger-escaped-br="br">


Xoxoxo oxoxox
Gabby

Do I Have an Eating Disorder?

To all my beautiful fudgies,

Good Wednesday!
Today, I get to see my little babies- the first girls I gave a conference to (http://fudgeperfection.blogspot.ca/2012/01/fudge-perfection-my-littles-angels.html), so I am in an incredibly happy mood :D
AAAAAAND I get to give another one October 3rd, with some of the old girls and some fresh young faces I can't wait to meet <3

The post I am about to write should have been written a while ago, due to the fact that
 I GET THIS QUESTION ALMOST EVERY.SINGLE.DAY.
Therefor this question needs to be answered, but before I write anything more, remember this:

If you have to ask yourself that question, no matter what my post says, ask your doctor or any mental health professional for a consultation.

1. Mental Disorder.

It does not matter how much you weight or how thin/skinny/thick/hippopotumus you look or think you look, eating disorders are mental disorders first and foremost.
Yes, the body will usually be affected after long term suffering of an eating disorder.
But no you cannot be too «FAT» to suffer from one.

EX: Can you be too freckled-face to suffer from schizophrenia?...I think not

So be sure to base yourself on purely mental conditions to answer this question.

2. Guilt. Shame. Disgust. 

From personal experience as well as scientific psychiatric tests and experiments, these three emotions are a constant in living your everyday life, which explains why eating disorders can lead to other mental health problems, such as social or general anxiety disorder and OCD.

Do you feel ashamed buying/ordering food?
Do you prefer to eat alone, because you feel people are judging you while they watch you eat?
Do you often cry out of disgust from your mirror reflection?
Do you feel guilty in scenarios that are not yours to feel guilty for?

These questions need to be asked more frequently, for they are the ones that, often subconsciously, rule our day-to-day life.

3. Control

(usually)People who suffer from anorexia are obsessed with controling their food/calorie intake, will separate/organize their food in an obsessive way and are more often than not very obsessive and controling over other parts of their life (school, frienship, tidiness, etc.)

We do these things when we feel we are losing control of our life,most likely our looks.
 therefor entering the vicious circle that is NEVER BEING IN CONTROL ENOUGH OR LOSING CONTROL FOR A QUICK, RAVENOUS BINGE.

Do you feel like you are losing control, like things are spinning too fast, like you can't keep up like you used to in certain areas (or all) in your life?
Do you feel overwhelmed and/or tired all the time, suffer from headaches or like you body is weakening?

4. Fear of the all mighty mirror, the powerful scale and the dreadful clothes size tag...

The triggers of all triggers. The only things «recovered» ED sufferees (that cant be a word, do not take seriously my vocabulary like you do my incredibly thoughout science...you are NOT ALOUD TO BE LAUGHING AT THE MOMENT) still have troubles with sometimes.

Mirrors are the hardest to get over, if that is even an accurate term for what one must do, because they are sort of e.v.e.r.y.w.h.e.r.e. whereas the scale and the tag can honestly be more easily amputed from your worried state of mind; they are numbers after all.

Do you feel your self-esteem shoot down when you walk in front of a reflection-inducing object, such as a car window?
Do you not want to be in pictures or want to see pictures of yourself?
Do you weight yourself knowing you will most likely freak out afterwards?
Do you stop shopping because you get depressed over your clothing size tag?

Most of all, as I said, wikipedia, online tests and even I cannot tell you for a fact what you suffer from.
Here is a post on what to do if you do want help, whatever you are suffering from: 
http://fudgeperfection.blogspot.ca/2012/04/how-do-i-get-help-advice-day.html

Please do not hesitate to email me for further questions,
I love you more than I love chocolate (and that is, I can assure you, a first)
xoxoxoxoxoxo
Gabby

Howling Ghosts, They Reappear

Hey gorg! <3

Its been a little while since I last posted, but expect a slew of posts this weekend :)
Slew probably meaning...two...
(shakes her head in shame)

The title of this post is a quote from one of my favorite bands, performing one of my favorite songs;
King and Lionheart, by Of Monsters and Men

Here is the full lyric:
Howling ghosts, they reappear 
In mountains that are stacked with fear

Slow clap for the depth of 'dem lyrics.

How do we add this brick of wisdom to the Fudge Perfection house?

Here's a little fact about yours truly:
Few things in the world scare me more than reuniting with people from my childhood.
I kid you not.
That, and spiders.
the nucleos is to the atomic bomb, as the previously mentioned insect and event is to my panic attacks.

I am studying for my SSATS. Everything, EVERYTHING, is an analogy to me now.

Back to my fear: I will have to discuss my anxiety with yall another time, but for now I will quickly explain why this fear haunts me so.

As most of you know, 6th grade was the year my sanity shot out the window, but it was also the year after which Quebecers change schools to enter «High School».
Ever since that final day amongst the people of my elementary school, their opinion of what I have become has consummed me.
Why, you ask?

Everytime I see or even think about one of those people, I am instantly brought back to the girl who finally cracked,
whose sanity finally succombed to the pressure of good grades, good looks and good girl,
whose self-esteem dove down into the bottom of the oceans as she sat in the bathroom stall during recess and did her homework.

And I start to care.
Care about what they'll think of me now
Care about having to impress them.
Care about their whispers as I walk by.
Care about letting them see my imperfections.

But how does one battle such a fear?
How do we face these howling ghost that reappear, in mountains that are stacked with fear...?
(ahhhhhh, you say. she does make sense. sometimes.)

You have to give up that fight and start a new one.

You can't win a fight based on hiding imperfections.
They will find them where they are, and where they are not.

But you can win a fight for the one thing that they have been taking away from you for far too long: your happiness.

Find things that make you happy, not that will impress them.
Find friends, find love that makes you happy, not that will make them jealous.
Read the FP blog... (JK, but it does make you happy, and it might very well  impress them...I'm just saying...)

Failure is not being rejected for a big part in the play, or not getting into the school you wanted.
Failure is rejecting your own happiness for the sake of the people you don't even like, or respect.

How silly is that, when you think about it?

SUCH SILLYNESS MAKES ME TIRED
Why was that in caps?
Why do I keep asking you guys direct questions?
God, I MUST STOP DOING THAT
:P

As I was saying, it's time for me to dream:  dreams of letting go of my past, dreams of my own happiness and acceptance, dreams of Jacob Hoggard...
Just kidding.
Or am I?
.
.
.
xoxoxoxoxoxo
Gabby

17 Body Peace Treaty: Day 9

All right dolls, let's jump right in to vow #9 because SOMEONE is in a bit of a rush :)

Vow #9: Remember that even the girl who I'd swap bodies with in a minute has something about her looks that she hates.

Hard to believe, isn't it?

Maybe if girls spent less time TRYING TO BRING EACH OTHER DOWN.....

I'm sorry, got a little carried away:P

But in all seriousness, here are a few things to keep in mind concerning this vow:

1. We want what we can't (or naturally don't) have

Girls with curly hair usually end up straightening their locks.

But girls with straight hair would give their left arm to have curly hair.

So if it seems completely impossible that Miss Perfect Body you idolize doesn't L.O.V.E. every single thing about her body, keep in mind that some of the things you may be so jealous of, she wants the exact opposite.

As a matter of fact, she herself might want to trade bodies with someone else, and it is entirely possible that YOU could be that person.

Example: I <<<33333 freckles. Don't have any, but I think they are just the epitome of facial adorableness, and I would love some (if God is somehow reading this blog...just keep that in mind, mmkay? :P ). Which means that of course that at least 75 % of lucky girls who are blessed with freckles would rather not have them at all.

2. How about if YOU were the all mighty so-called-perfect-body girl?

Still have a hard time believing she doesn't wake up every morning thanking the Universe for this «perfect» body of hers? Think of this.

You, in your lifetime, have been, will be or are right now the beholder of a or several physical attribute/s that another girl would swap with hers in a nanosecond.

YOU ARE THE GIRL WHOSE BODY YOU SO IDOLIZE

Now Imagine all things you don't truly adore about your body...

And how if you told said girl who admires what you have that you don't love everything about your body, she probably wouldn't believe you, just like you don't believe your perfect body beholder.

Brace yourselves...I feel a breakthrough coming....<3

3. The last thing you should basically tell yourself in every scenario in life EVER is this:

You are enough.

You don't need to swap bodies, and you shouldn't want to, either (so I guess I have to take back my offer God...).

Why would you want to change anything about yourself!

BTW I LOVE YOU GUYS!

I HAVE SOLD OVER 20 BRACELETS TO INTERNATIONAL FUDGIES! YAY! <3

xoxoxoxooxoxoxoxo

Gabby

They are HEEERRE: Fudge Perfection Bracelets

I am so excited to say that The Fudge Perfection Project has its own WRISTBANDS!!!
YAYYYYYYYYYY <3

Pictures will be below :)

As you can see, the FPP wristbands are a beautiful bright neon pink with Fudge Perfection simply inked in teal.
They are half an inch wide and will fit anyone's wrist-trust me on that one :P
***Thank you to the lovely fudgie member Eleanor who told me where I could make 'em :)

If you know me in real life, I'll always have a few of them with me for sale.
They are 1 $ each :)
If you don't know me in real life and want to get a FPP wristband email me at
fudgeperfection@gmail.com
And we will work something out for payment and shipping :)

As always, I love you all
xoxoxoxo
Gabby

17 Body Peace Treaty: Day 8

Good Morning Dolls!<3

Since I skipped a day of blogging, I will have another post up for yall later today, because there is so much going on and I have some very exciting news! (hint-hint: it goes around your wrist....)

Let's get going on our 8th vow, shall we?

Vow #8: Remind myself that what you see isn't always what you get on TV and in ads- it takes a lot of airbrushing, dieting, money, and work to look like that.

Waking up one morning, you look in the mirror and say to yourself:
«Hey! I don't look half bad today...»
Head held high with a beaming smile, you walk out of your house and into the real world.
BAM! Victoria's Secret ad
BAM!BAM! (that Tv show you love where no one has an inch of fat on their body. I couldn't pick one, have you BEEN ON THE CW LATELY?»
And somehow you're not-half-bad has morphed into I-want-to-crawl-into-a-hole-of-Ben-and-Jerrys bad.

Now I will say this now and I will say it again: I do not believe that Photoshop, Magazines, and the media in general is responsible for eating disorders. (to read more about the reasons behind my positions click here)
Which means that if your mental health was on a scale of 0-10,
0 being «no eating disorder or other mental illness» ,
1 being the beginning of an eating disorder and/or other mental illness
and 10 being «most likely in the last stages of life»,

The media cannot bring a girl from 0 to 1.
However, it can fuel a girl up from 1 to 9.

Which explains the importance of today's vows: eating disorder or not, it can ultimately really bring down a girl's self-esteem.
And as I'm sure you know: THAT IS NOT OKAY WITH ME ;)
Here are my TV/ads crackdowns:

1. Ads: Not selling self-esteem, are they now? :P
Have you ever seen the Dove Evolution Video? (if not, click here)
As someone who has worked backstage in the makeup departement (just when you thought you knew me perfectly...:P) I can personally say that the amount of time put into that girl's face before the photoshoot is SOOOOOO NOT LONG ENOUGH TO BE A REAL AD

Sad right? A MUA will take MINIMUM one whole hour, sometimes up to 4 hours to prep the girl's face for the shoot. These models are photoshopped before even one camera flash goes off!

But WHY? WHY ARE THEY DOING THIS TO US?
There is only one answer to all questions starting with a WHY? in the consumerism industry...
MONEY MONEY AND ESPECIALLY...MORE MONEY.

Ads are designed to make you want, no- NEED, the product they are selling, whoever they are and however they can achieve that goal.
If an ad made you feel all good inside, you wouldn't need that new (insert product here), because you're perfect just like that.

All the marketing strategists in the world just cringed ferociously at that last sentence ;)
You have to feel incomplete because to all these companies:
Feeling incomplete+need to be complete+girl on the ad looks complete+must buy whatever she sells=enough money to buy another yacht in France

So dont fall for those trips, you're now a regular Nancy Drew, cracking all the mysteries of the advertising market <3

2. TV: a lovely combo of genetics, money and lots of 5 calorie salads
Your favorite show is on; Great!
The actors in that show all have 0.0000001 % body fat; G.r.e.a.t.

Here is the thing: before I go all CRAZY-DIET-FREAKS on these poor actors, I will say that some of them, again SOME of them, are naturally, genetically thin.
Fast metabolism, family skinny genes, what have you...
(Yes, I know. Some of us would sell our siblings for that DNA)

Back to the point: A TV show's cast's job is to create a fake reality, a believable world, a portrayal of a certain lifestyle.
Not to bash their acting, but I don't think Gossip Girl would have hired even Meryl Streep if she would have auditioned.
Looks are a huge part of these storylines, therefor an actor's JOB, besides playing pretend, is to keep up a certain look, a certain physique.

You & I don't have jobs like that (just speaking for myself really, who KNOWS who could be reading the blog).
I'm a full-time student. And a full-time FPP-editor-email-answerer-boss-lady.
So OF COURSE we can't look like that!

Besides, why would you want to be these people?
1. You're GOR-GEOUS just like you are.
and 2. Would you really want to be stuck in all that crazy CW drama?
I think I'll keep my sanity, thank you very much :) <3

That is it for this post!
Keep your eye out today for some other exciting updates and announcements!
xoxoxoxoxoxoxox
Gabby

17 Body Peace Treaty: Day 7

We are a full week into the Seventeen Mag Body Peace Treaty Vow/Day!
I would truly appreciate it if you guys could help me out here to get these posts seen by Seventeen Mag!
***What you can do:
1. Select your favorite 17 BPT post so far (let's take day 1 for example: http://fudgeperfection.blogspot.ca/2012/07/17-body-peace-treaty-day-1.html)
2.a) Option 1: tweet it to @seventeenmag and tell em what it is
Example: Hey @seventeenmag check out @fudgeperfection body peace treaty!!!http://fudgeperfection.blogspot.ca/2012/07/17-body-peace-treaty-day-1.html

b) Option 2: Do the same but on their facebook page found here: https://www.facebook.com/seventeenmagazine

c) Ask them to check it out on their tumblr page: http://seventeen.tumblr.com/

Thank you all so much for your support, I hope you enjoy today's post!<3

Vow #7: Quiet that negative little voice in my head when it starts to say mean things about my body that I'd never tolerate anyone else saying about me

This vow is basically the epitome of the Fudge Perfection Project.
Here are some other posts you may want to check out for more tips and tricks:
The <3 your reflection part 1 post
and the sequel to part 1 post :)

Here's the deal with this vow:

When other people call you out on imperfections, you should never let it get to you.
Why give them the power to mess with your self-esteem?
You are so much better than that, and you know it.

So how come we can brush off other people's crazy comments, but not the ones coming from our own heads?
Does it mean that because you say it to yourself, all of the sudden those negative, belittling comments becomes true?

Imma let you in on a little secret: The evil voice is wrong

How can she be right? She cant even see anything right WITH YOU?
Yes, I am aware that that's her job. To critique you. To, dare I say it, perfect you.

Your brain is constantly working and, as you know, it can get really exhausting up in there.
That negative voice is just wasting your brain's (therefor, your) time and energy.

Why waste your time listening to someone who's ultimate goal in life is to bring you down?
When you could be listening to a voice who sees the beauty in you?

Take my advice; DUMP THE VOICE.

HOW TO DO IT: Everytime, he/she/it tries to get a word in, start signing your favorite empowering song instead.
(need one? here are my favorites: http://fudgeperfection.blogspot.ca/2012/03/top-10-stay-strong-songs.html )

That's all for today!
Dont forget to help us get Seventeen on the FPP wagon (if you want :P)
Love yall
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Gabby